Between Them

Between them, they have three children, six grandchildren, and eleven great-grandkids.

Between them, they have run a business, which helped a lot of young people learn what a good work ethic looks like.

Between them, they have mentored many through coaching baseball, living their faith at work, and teaching classes and small groups at church.

Between them, they have health issues that have slowed them down.

Between them, they have also suffered through the death of parents, siblings, friends, and grandchildren.

Between them, there is the strength of over sixty years of marriage.

Between them, there is a deep abiding faith that gets them through the darkest night.

Between them is where I needed to be.

As I drove up Interstate 85 yesterday, there was a need deep inside my soul to be between them. I arrived at their church at 9:00, and my heart sank when I didn’t see their car. I called her phone, no answer. I called his phone, which she answered.

Me: Are you guys coming to church?

Her: Yes.

Me: Well you’re late.

Her: Where are you?

Me: Sitting in the parking lot outside your church! Don’t ya’ll start at 9?

Her: (With laughter in her voice) They changed it to one service during the summer and it starts at 10. Here talk to your daddy. (As she hands him the phone) She’s at the church waiting on us.

Him: Look for the guy that looks like Uncle Philip (James), and we’ll be there in about 20 minutes.

I went on in, found James and Colleen and a few other folks I used to go to church with and waited for them to arrive.

Time for church.

For those who may not know, church has been a hard spot for me since Michael died, especially worship. I love God with all my heart, but lately, we’ve not been on great speaking terms. I’m gonna stop right here and say this loud for all the people in the back…

**GOD’S NOT MAD AT ME FOR IT!**

Now that I’ve cleared that up, let’s continue.

We went in and I sat between them. Dad on my right, mom on my left. I can’t tell you the last time I sat between them in church, but I can tell you it’s probably been over 40 years. And the worship began. I knew the song, but when I try to sing, the words get stuck in my throat. And then something beautiful happened, I could hear mom on my left pouring her song to the Father and I could dad to my right pouring his song to the Father. And as they sang their worship, mine became a little easier. The weight of anger and bitterness toward well-meaning people who say well-meaning things that stab like a knife when you’re in the midst of grief, started to be lifted. The weight of anger and bitterness toward God (see ** above!), started to be lifted. As the tears flowed unabated down my cheeks, I felt a shift.

Between them, they showered me with grace.

Between them, they showed me understanding.

Between them, they poured, through their worship, a healing balm over some gaping wounds.

Between them, they are loving me back from one of the darkest places I’ve ever been.

Between them, I am loved right where I am.

Between them, I am seen.

The Perfect Gift…

Years ago, I received a small ceramic nativity set in a game of Dirty Santa. It had Jesus in the manger, Mary and Joseph, a small shed with a star on top, one shepherd, one sheep, one king, and one donkey. It wasn’t fancy, expensive, or even colorful, but it was the perfect size to pack and carry with me to my new home in South Africa. That little nativity set out year-round in every home we lived in until December 2020.

When we left eSwatini in April 2020, we thought we would be back no later than October, but God had spoken to our hearts that we would not be going back onto the mission field. Brett and I came to terms with this and worked to find someone to hold some of our belongings for a couple from a team to bring back to us and to find someone to sell the rest of our things. There were several things we wanted to be sure we got back: my elephant mug from Starbucks that my brother, Joe, gave me before we left, our camera, binoculars, and important documents. But somehow, I forgot to put my little nativity set on the list, so it didn’t come home. I have longed for a simple nativity since, every year going out and trying to find one with no luck.

Every time I would go out to look for a little nativity scene, I would call or message my daughter, Hannah, and say, “I wish I could find a nativity! I don’t want a fancy one; I want a simple one like I had in Africa, and I want Jesus to have a little color because he is of Middle-Eastern descent, and they have color to their skin.” Hannah always understood this moment, even though she had heard it every year…for four years!

So what did my beautiful daughter do? She took it upon herself to make me a nativity, and oh, how precious it is! Each piece is put together with time, yarn, wood, glue, and love. This gift is absolutely priceless!

I could have purchased a nativity from the store, with every single piece perfectly painted and with little personality. But this little nativity has personality! The donkey’s head is turned in a way that says, “I’m sorry, who exactly are you to come rolling up in my stable?” The cow has one horn turned up and the other turned down, which made me laugh because when we would leave Kruger Park, we would always look for the “domestic bovine” with the horns that were all cattywampus. The little sheep, bless him, looks a little like a giant mole, we all laughed about this because I had actually thought she had made an elephant…the Bible does not specifically name any animals so it could have been an elephant! And the baby Jesus looks a little like a half opened peanut….

…see…I told you!

Some of you may be thinking, “Why would she pick this gift apart and tell us the “imperfections?” I’ll tell you why. Because these are not “imperfections” in my eyes but they are what make this gift uniquely mine. Hannah will never make another set that looks exactly like one. Sure, you can purchase the factory-made, perfectly painted nativity and have something that is what others would call aesthetically pleasing and looks just like a thousand other ones, or you can have one no one else in the world has…I prefer this one! Why? Because it reminds me that although I am no where near perfect, Jesus, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, still came to a manger, walked a sinless life among the sin-filled, was crucified on a cross, rose again, and is seated at the right hand of the Father ever making intercession for his redeemed, still no where near perfect daughter, me.

What is the Report…

…about you? Take a moment to read 3 John (NIV) below and consider the report that John received from fellow believers about Gaius’ hospitality and love and Diotrephe’s lack of hospitality and love.

The elder,

To my dear friend Gaius, whom I love in the truth.

Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well. It gave me great joy when some believers came and testified about your faithfulness to the truth, telling how you continue to walk in it.

Dear friend, you are faithful in what you are doing for the brothers and sisters, even though they are strangers to you. They have told the church about your love. Please send them on their way in a manner that honors God. It was for the sake of the Name that they went out, receiving no help from the pagans. We ought therefore to show hospitality to such people so that we may work together for the truth.

I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to be first, will not welcome us. So when I come, I will call attention to what he is doing, spreading malicious nonsense about us. Not satisfied with that, he even refuses to welcome other believers. He also stops those who want to do so and puts them out of the church.

Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God. Demetrius is well spoken of by everyone-even by the truth itself. We also speak well of him and you know that our testimony is true.

I have much to write to you, but I do not want to do so with pen and ink. I hope to see you soon, and we will talk face to face.

Peace to you. The friends here send their greetings. Greet the friends there by name.

Have you ever said, “Sure, you can come stay with me for the weekend, or I’ll host a few people from the mission team coming in?” And then, once the words come out of your mouth, your brain starts to run wild with all the things you need to do….Clean the bathroom, make the beds with fresh sheets, go buy coffee, coffee filters, I wonder if they like eggs, I wonder what kind of chocolate they like, and on and on the list goes.

And then when they leave, your brain starts again…they said they had a great time but I wonder if they’re just saying it to make me feel good, did they really feel welcome in my home, what can I do better next time and the list goes on and on.

Right in the middle of all the questioning, you get a text from your pastor, and they say, “Wow, you really knocked it out of the park! My phone just blew up asking if they can stay with you next year. Thank you for opening your home and loving on people!” Suddenly, you go from questioning to feeling encouraged, and although you are exhausted and know you have to clean the sheets and the bathrooms, you have an unexpected energy that hits you and before you know it, you’re reading your house for the next guest.

Those who stayed with Gaius reported to John how Gaius had treated them with warmth and the love of Christ while they were with him. Gaius was willing to face reprimands from Diotrephes, who apparently did not show Christ’s love to fellow believers. At least, that’s how I read it.

So, here’s the question, what is being said about you? Are your co-workers going home and talking about how you have shown them love and hospitality, or are they going home and complaining about you? Is your family always complaining about how selfish you are, or are they telling people you are there to help in any way you can? And trust me, I am not just asking you the question! Reading 3 John had me asking myself these very same questions. I want to be sure I have a heart like Gaius. Willing to show love to those around him and not a prideful heart like Diotrephes who gossiped and refused to welcome fellow believers.

If you’re unsure about where your heart is, ask the Lord. He will answer! Then, be vulnerable with someone you know you can trust and ask them to hold you accountable for how you treat people. I know he has revealed some things to me, and I am working on them!

One last note…if you are interested in opening up your home to host someone and you’re not really sure what to do, I would suggest talking with my friend Kim Tucker. She is a Gaius if ever there was one!

The Power of Words

In my very first semester at Southeastern University, I had to write a paper on the power of the written word, from a Christian perspective. I cried several times throughout the writing of the paper as I was learning things such as how to write a cover page, set up proper margins, and properly cite quoted work. My first submission came back with a C and a note from the professor, “Let’s set up a time to talk.” My second submission came back with a B+ and a note, “Almost there! I know you have an A in you! If you fix the areas I’ve highlighted, you will make that A!” I fixed the areas and submitted the paper one last time, A+ and a note from the professor, “Now you’re on the right foot!” Following is the result of a patient professor who knew words of encouragement were needed!

From the very beginning of time, it was the spoken word that created the world and gave it life. It was also the spoken word that brought death to a perfect creation. God had given a mandate to Adam, he could eat of any tree in the garden, except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Upon eating this tree, he would surely die. The enemy didn’t use an earthquake to get Eve’s attention, he used the power of words. Looking at today’s world you can see that he’s still up to his old tricks. This is why Christians need to understand the power of their words, whether written or spoken. In an article for Christianity Today, Meadow Rue Merrill writes,

For the Christian writer, the worth of our work does not lie in the marketability of our words or in what honors we may win; it lies in how our work furthers the kingdom of God. If our goal is to write a bestseller, we may achieve it. But if our goal is to write in response to the impulse of God, we may forgo temporal approval to achieve something far greater – or we may attain both. The result of our work is beyond our control. As Christians, we are simply called to be faithful.[1]

When Brett and I became missionaries, I started this blog with the sole purpose of telling the stories of our daily lives. I didn’t want to make money or a have huge following, I just wanted a way to express myself. It was in the writing of the blog that I realized just how powerful our words are and the effects that our words have on others. We had just been through an extremely hard season in eSwatini when I sat down at the kitchen table and penned these words;

Where Are You Lord?

Oh Lord, where are you in the midst of my drowning? The waves continually crash over me, dragging me to the rocky, murky bottom. The coral that you created to have beauty, is ripping me to pieces with their sharp, jagged edges. My feet are caught between rocks and my body is being wrapped up in the kelp as the waves continue to push me downward into the abyss. My lungs fight for air as my heart burst and is broken over the words, “The baby has died.” Oh Lord, where are you” Wave after wave after wave has pushed me further and further and further under. I grab, I reach, I strain for someone to pull me up, but there is no one there. They are all safely tucked away in their boats of safety, behind their wall of, “Why should I care, she chose this life.” I can no longer fight, I release the breath that I’ve been holding. I give up. Oh Lord, where are you? And then I look up. A strong arm! A mighty arm! You are here! Here in the midst of the mighty storm that seeks to drown me. Here! My very present help in time of need. Here! Saying, “Peace! Be still!” You are speaking words to my heart that only I can hear. You restore my torn and battered flesh. You breathe your breath of life into my lungs. You gently gather every shattered piece of my heart and lovingly put it back together. You pull me onto your lap and continue to speak words of encouragement and refreshing to me. You are mine. You are beautiful. I will never leave you. You are priceless. You did not fail. You are my beloved. Be healed.

These written words poured out in a moment of despair, and helped others find healing in their grief. I was overwhelmed that my words had held such power. However, to show how words can also lead to death, I must also share the following.

While serving in Africa, we found out just how strong the power of words, especially curses, can actually be. We worked with a young woman who had a beautiful daughter. When her daughter was one, she found out she was pregnant again. Her neighbors were not happy that she got pregnant “so soon” after her firstborn and they spoke curses over her. “I curse you and tell you that this baby will die.” Though she is a Christian, she took these words to heart and indeed, her baby died. This is the reason that most African women don’t tell anyone that they are pregnant, nor do they talk about it. And no one touches a pregnant woman’s belly. The belief is that if someone touches the belly they will put a curse on the mother and the baby and these curses cannot be broken. The power of words is that strong.

Matthew 12:36-37 I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned. I know that this scripture especially states words they speak, but I believe that the written word also falls into this. It is a heavy thing to know that we will give account for every idle word. When we write we must pay attention to our words and make sure that they are words of life and not death.

“We never know – perhaps the seeds we sow in our writing and our teaching of writing will someday bear fruit.”[2] Icy Lee.

[1] Meadow Merrill, “The How and Why of Writing as a Christian,” Christianity Today, December 11, 2019. Accessed, April 17, 2021. https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2019/december-web-only/write-better-andrew-lepeau-editor-intervarsity.html?utm_medium=widgetemail

[2] Icy Lee, “Living Out the Christian Faith in the Writing Classroom,” International Journal of Christianity & English Language Teaching, Volume 2, March 2015.

A Funny Thing Happened

…on the way to doing it my way.

Original post 8-16-2016

I had contacted everyone I knew by phone and on Facebook, Twitter, Google Plus, Instagram, and Brett’s favorite place, YouTwittFaceGram.com, yet all my efforts seemed to hit a wall. As I looked at my computer with dread, trying to find another way to write and share our story, I heard the Lord say, “Rest.”

“Seriously, God? Rest? May I take just a moment of your time and remind you that we have a budget that we need to come up with? May I also remind you that people are asking the extremely important question of, “when are you going back,” every Sunday? And! I remind you, I am ready to go back?! And now you’re telling me to rest?! What?!”

Now, before you judge me on my questions to God, please take a moment and think about the last time God told you to do something that you didn’t understand. Yep, hold that feeling right there! LOL!!

I love God, His mercy and grace, and His many chances with me! He lovingly, and I personally believe, there was a grin on his face when he said again, “Rest.” Well, okay. Exactly what does that mean? “It means rest. You’ve done all that you know to do to fundraise. You’ve done all that others have told you to do. You’ve listened to others’ ideas and opinions; now rest and listen to Me.”

So, with this word of the Lord in my heart, I have rested. I have sat in His presence. I have listened as He has filled my heart with goodness about who He is and who I am in Him. I have not written a letter to anyone, but Him, and I have filled my journal with sweet moments between me and my Rock. I have rested and in the midst of resting….

A funny thing happened!

Brett and I got news on Monday that shocked us and filled us with joy. We got the news that Chris and Kacy, our South African country directors with Children’s Cup, are stepping down with ‘Cup. This was the shocking part for us; yes, there were some tears. However!! God has spoken with Chris and Kacy about planting a church, which has filled us with great joy! You can read all about it here. We love this family and know that they are hearing and doing the will of God for their lives!

To answer the question that could be running rampant through your head now…YES! We are staying with Children’s Cup! Believe it or not, they like us and want us to be a part of the ‘Cup family!

As the day progressed, I had a doctor’s appointment to talk with the doctor about my skydiving injury. Okay, I wasn’t skydiving, but jumping in the pool. After an x-ray, it was determined that I had fractured my ankle. I didn’t break any major, weight-bearing bones but a tiny bone that attaches to a ligament. What does this mean you ask? This means a beautiful, fashionable black boot for the next four weeks. (It could have been worse!) The boot is for standing only and for short periods of time. The doctor wants me to continue using my incredibly stylish and fast scooter to give this ankle time to heal. Brett has been remarkable in making sure that I take care of myself. After thirty-one years of marriage, he very sweetly nicknamed me Turbo!

Needless to say, this had been an emotional, teary-eyed day. Things are changing in South Africa, we’re not there yet to walk it through with Chris and Kacy and I’m all laid up in this gorgeous, fashionable black boot….and then….

A funny thing happened!

God reminded me of exactly who He is and how He’s got this. As we sat and chatted with our son, Michael, Brett’s phone vibrated. Don’t ask me why, but I reached over and opened the email that had come in. It was an email from a pastor that we had met for lunch, visited the church twice, and had a ten-minute interview with their missions team. When we met with the missions team, I did not feel good about how it went because they didn’t ask questions! He told us he would email Brett later in the week to let us know yes or no. We already knew that this pastor has Monday off, so we weren’t looking for an email until later in the week. This church has partnered with us, and the amount is fantastic!

A funny thing happened!

As I sat there and read the email, I could feel God looking at me with a big ‘ole grin on His face, saying, “Daughter, I told you, rest and watch what I do.” And then it happened….tears of laughter and joy began to fall. I sat there and laughed at what God did and is doing on our behalf. He is opening doors, and He is making the way! And what am I doing? I am resting in His presence, listening to His voice, and reading His word with greater understanding. Did I mention that I’m resting?

A funny thing happened on this journey called life…

I rested from doing,

God showed Himself faithful, and then…

We laughed!

Let Everything!

Psalm 150 is one of my all-time favorite Psalms!

Praise the Lord!
Praise God in His sanctuary;
   praise Him in His mighty heavens!
Praise Him for His mighty deeds;
     praise Him according to His excellent greatness!
Praise Him with the trumpet sound;
     praise Him with lute and harp!
Praise Him with tambourine and dance;
     praise Him with strings and pipe!
Praise Him with sounding cymbals;
     praise Him with loud clashing cymbals!
Let EVERYTHING that has BREATH praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord!

According to Strong’s Concordance, praise hālal H1984 means to be clamorously foolish, to rave, to boast, to celebrate, to give glory to. When I read this, I cannot help but think about King David returning the Ark of the Covenant, the representation of the very presence of God, back to Jerusalem.

In 2 Samuel 6:1-2, David again gathered all the chosen men of Israel, thirty thousand. And David arose and went with all the people who were with him from Baale-judah to bring up from there the ark of God, which is called by the name of the Lord of hosts who sits enthroned on the cherubim. Vs. 5 And David and all the house of Israel were celebrating before the Lord, with songs and lyres and harps and tambourines and castanets and cymbals. Take a moment and imagine the sound that thirty thousand-plus people were making as they marched. Now, imagine them shouting, singing, playing lyres, harps, castanets, cymbals, and tambourines…I mean have you ever heard of a quiet tambourine or cymbal?! This was not, by any stretch of the imagination, a quiet procession! My guess is, you could hear them coming from miles away!

Imagine you are living in the city of David, you hear a celebration and wonder what is going on and you look out your window to see King David dancing with all his might before the Ark, dancing with all his might before the presence of God! Would you stop washing dishes, grab the kids, and head outside to join the celebration of Jehovah? I like to think I would be right in the middle of it!

The people were having a party! It was loud and boastful, and it was a celebration giving glory and honor to Jehovah, God! The representation of the very presence of God was back among the people! They were celebrating their Healer, their Rock, their Strong Tower, and their Deliverer! How could anyone help but worship?

Everyone was having a great time, except for Michal. She looked out her window and had nothing but contempt for David. Michal felt David had made himself look like a vulgar, shameless fellow instead of the mighty king that he was. She was so concerned with how things looked that she missed the entire point, the Ark of the Covenant, the representation of the presence of God, was back and there was great reason to rejoice. Because of her contempt, Michal missed the whole celebration and she missed the whole point. But don’t we do the same thing?

Psalm 150 speaks of trumpets, lutes, harps, tambourines, strings, pipes, and even LOUD clashing cymbals being played in the sanctuary, and yet we go into our places of worship, the place that represents the presence of God and we slip in quietly almost like we’re afraid we’re going to disturb God.

Here’s something to think about, the Israelites were celebrating and they had to stay in the outer courts and could not even go into the Holy of Holies. They couldn’t come close to the Presence of God because of sin. But when Christ died on the cross, the veil that kept the “ordinary” people out of the Holy of Holies, was torn in two and we gained access to the very Presence of God! Is that not something to rejoice about?!

I know what He brought me out of and how He redeemed me. I know how He protected me and how He went to the enemy’s camp and said, “This one’s debt has been paid and she belongs to Me!” So! As for me, I will worship God, my Redeemer, Healer, Rock, and Strong Tower with my entire being. I will clap my hands like cymbals, my shout will be like a trumpet blast, and oh yes, I will dance before the King the Kings because I know what the blood Jesus did for me.

Anything Really Good…

Original post 6/23/2016

…is worth the wait!

Recently, Brett had breakfast with someone that asked him the following question….

“Do you believe that God is closing this door?” They were asking about our new journey with Children’s Cup.

At first, I was not very happy about this question, and it took me about an hour to get my words to come out (stop laughing!) concerning how I felt about being asked the question, however! This person asked the hard question and they did it in love and concern for Brett and me. I am thankful to them because this question forced me to spend some time with God to get an answer.

The question was asked on Friday and by Sunday, Brett and I had our answer! Persevere!

The Lord spoke to me about how we live in a microwave world. We want everything right now, this minute, no waiting! We want websites to open within seconds. We want our text messages to go through in a nanosecond. We want it right now, whether right now is good for us or not. Think about that for a minute.

Just about everything is available in microwave form, but it’s not good for us. The thing is, when we heat things in the microwave, they come out too soggy, too crunchy, too rubbery, too…well…yucky!

Anything really good is worth the wait!

Think about it…have you ever been around when your grandmother fixed a pound cake and all you wanted was for that oven to ding so you could get a slice? It seemed to take forever! But when that first bite hit your mouth…Oh. My. Goodness!

Anything really good is worth the wait!

The Lord spoke to Abraham and promised that his offspring would be like the number of the stars. The problem was, that this promise wasn’t happening fast enough for Sarah, so she took the microwave approach and gave Hagar to Abraham. God blessed Ishmael, but Ishmael was not the promised son. Isaac was. Ninety-nine years old! Abraham and Sarah had waited for the promise of Isaac. They were both past the child-bearing years! But God! Sarah conceived, they had Isaac, and the promise was fulfilled!

Anything really good is worth the wait!

Let’s move on to David. It is believed that David was anointed king over Israel when he was about 25 years old and then had to wait until he was 30 to actually rule over Israel. In those five years, many things happened…David became the armor-bearer to King Saul. He killed Goliath, and King Saul became Jealous and tried to kill him. David had to escape from King Saul and ended up living in a cave…the anointed King of Israel was living in a cave! Many other things happened to David before he became King of Israel, but David persevered! King Saul dies and finally, David is anointed King of Israel! The promise from God that David would be King has finally happened! Five years AFTER he was anointed!

These are only two, of many, examples in the Word where God spoke a promise and it was many years in the making. God has used these examples to show me that anything really good is worth the wait!

So! The question is this, what do you do in the waiting? Do you wait in worry and anxiousness or do you wait with open hands? Honestly, I’ve done a bit of both. Yep, I’m human! I have days where I cry, “When, God, when will we get the funds we need?” And then I have days where I cry, “God, you’re so awesome and I fully trust that You are doing great work and that our funds are coming in!”

Are you in the place of waiting? Are you wanting a microwave solution, even though waiting for that pound cake is better? We’ve all either been there, are in the middle of it, or are going there. There is good news! His Word gives us plenty of encouragement on how to wait and what happens when we wait!

Psalm 130:5-6 I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word, I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning.

Psalm 27:13-14 I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord: be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Isaiah 40:31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Acts 1:4 And while staying with them he ordered them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for the promise of the Father, which, he said, “you heard from me.”

Romans 12:12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.

James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and completely lacking in nothing.

Romans 5:3-5 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

Hebrews 10:36 For you have need of endurance, so that when you have one the will of God you may receive what is promised.

Hebrews 12:1-2 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

And you can’t have one without the other!

What Song Are You Listening To?

Original post 10/16/2015

When I was growing up, if I was in the car with my dad, the radio was on and we were singing with every song that came on (so y’all can blame it on him!). If we were in the grocery store and he wanted to sing a song about buying toilet paper, he sang it! He would make up songs about whatever came to mind. If someone said something like, “I feel good,” yep, we would break out with our best James Brown…don’t deny it, you just did the same thing!

I can hear a song and it will immediately take me back, Great Balls of Fire takes me to the first time Brett and I were riding with my dad at the beach and while Dad and I played the dashboard, Brett was lying on the floorboard trying not to be seen! When I hear Backfield in Motion or I Love Beach Music, I can close my eyes and see my mom and dad dancing the Carolina Shag or taking walks on the beach with my dad, riding in the back of a truck with my brothers going to the beach, going to softball games, little league games and Granite Lake and it makes me smile. I hear classical music and my mind drifts to going to sleep beside my mom when dad worked third shift. She would set the timer on the clock radio to 60 minutes and I’d drift off to sleep to Bach. And do you know what I drift off to when I fly? You got it, classical.

I’m guessing you’re wondering where this is going and I’m going to tell you right now. Just as these songs elicit memories that make me smile, there are also the songs that, if I’m not careful, I’ll play over and over in my mind that do not elicit smiles but questions about who I am. We all do it. We’ll tune into R.E.G.R.E.T radio and we’ll listen to the top 6 countdown…I Wish I Had, I Shoulda, I Could Have Done it Better, I’ll Never Make It, I’m Not Good Enough, and, my personal favorite, What If. The main problem with R.E.G.R.E.T radio, is that is owned and operated by the enemy of our soul, Satan, and his desire is to get you to play these same songs over and over and over, until they become your only sound track and you can’t hear what W.O.G.R…Word of God Radio…has to say.

W.O.G.R is playing tunes that uplift your soul and bring healing to the places that R.E.G.R.E.T radio doesn’t want you to get healing for. Let’s check out the top 10 songs on W.O.G.R!

10. Colossians 2:10 I am COMPLETE in Him Who is the head of all principality and power

9. Ephesians 2:5 I am ALIVE with Christ

8. Romans 8:2 I am FREE from the law of sin and death

7. Ephesians 1:4 / 1 Peter 1:16 I am holy and WITHOUT blame before Him in LOVE

6. Philippians 4:7 I have the PEACE of God that passes ALL understanding

5. 1 John 4:4 I HAVE the greater One living IN me; GREATER is He that is IN me than he that is in the world

4. Romans 5:17 I have received the gift of RIGHTEOUSNESS and reign as a king in life by Christ Jesus

3. Ephesians 2:10 I AM God’s workmanshsip, CREATED in Christ for good works

2. 2 Corinthians 5: I AM a NEW creature in Christ

1. Romans 8:37-39 No, in all these things we ARE more than conquerors through Him who LOVED us. For I am SURE that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor ANYTHING else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the LOVE of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

This is only the top 10! There are many more scriptures in the Word of God that tell us who we are in Him! I encourage you today to take the time to press STOP on R.E.G.R.E.T radio and press PLAY on W.O.G.R! Let that station play on repeat and, trust me, He will continue to heal your heart and lift you up!

March 23, 2024 This blog may have been written in 2015, but it remains true today. We can continue to listen to R.E.G.R.E.T radio or we can lean into a much better station, W.O.G.R! And just as the songs above can take me back to memories that are precious and full of joy, the following songs take me back and remind me of the places God met me!

I had someone tell me once that I worship too loud. This is my response…

Our God is worthy of our praise!

Rise Up!

Original post 7/7/2015

Titus 2:3-5English Standard Version (ESV)

3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, 4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

Has God ever spoken something to you that you questioned His timing or said the words, “Um, I think you’ve got the wrong person?” Now, for those of you who just answered “No,” I will be praying for you because I believe we’ve all done it at one time or another. My time was about two months ago. God began to speak to me five words…”rise up, daughter of God!”
My very first thought was, “rise up? I thought I did the rising up when I left my family and moved to South Africa to do the work of the ministry?”

God’s response? “Yes, you did. Now, I want you to rise up further.”

“This is getting ready to get even harder, isn’t it?”

“Yes, my daughter, but it’s nothing that you can not handle as long as you choose to stay rooted in Me and allow the Holy Spirit to lead you. You can do this!”

“How do You know?” YES! I just asked God that question…stop laughing!

“Because I created it in you. I created you for good works!“

“Ok, then. Let’s do this!”

In the beginning, this was awesome, and I was ready to do it, and then…yep, then life happened. I had the opportunity to start walking out exactly what God was calling me to. I had the opportunity to rise up and honestly, I. Did. Not. Like. It!

Growing up, I remember my granddaddy, a great man of God, saying, “This is what the enemy of our soul desires to do, steal the Word that has been spoken to us, because he knows that if it takes root in us, we will draw our swords and do battle. Rising up to be who God intended for us to be.

Make no mistake, battle lines were drawn.

The enemy of my soul is on one side, ready to steal the word, with me on the other, sword drawn, ready to rise up.

The difference between the sides is this: God, my God, is on my side! God had spoken a word to me that I grabbed onto and planted deep within my spirit.

Yes, God is calling me deeper. God is calling me to be a complete Titus woman.

Be reverent.

Rise up!

Don’t gossip. Even with prayer requests!

Rise up!

Teach what is good. Which means I must know what the Word says!

Rise up!

Train the young women.

Rise up!

Even when I want to yell and scream.

Rise up!

Be pure.

Rise up!

Submit to Brett.

Please know that I have not yet arrived; however, I am trying my best to fulfill the role God has entrusted to me.

Rise up!

Rise up, daughter of God.

Rise up!

March 20, 2024, God gave me this mandate again in March of 2022 and the fruit of that Rise Up moment will be fulfilled on April 26, 2024, when I receive my BS in Ministerial Leadership: Pastoral Care and Counseling! And after that date, I’m pretty sure God will have other Rise Up moments for this daughter!

The Place is Different…

…The Purpose is the Same!

I have a wonderful friend named Dee, and she notices things. The other day, she sent me a text, and the exchange went like this…

Dee…You ok?

Yes…why? Did I miss lunch? (We try to have lunch once a month, and I’ve been messing up dates big time this month!)

Dee…No…you seem nostalgic on FB.

Just trying to move old blogs over to the new site, it’s amazing how they are still so relevant. I’m really good.

Dee…I’ve been reading them…hard to believe it was 2012! End of text.

I’ve had some time to think about Dee’s inquiry, and you know what I’ve decided? While it is true that I am trying to get all the blogs in one spot, doing so has made me a bit nostalgic. Although I know I am exactly where God wants me at this moment, looking back at what God has done in my life, the places I’ve had the chance to go, and the people I have met reminds me of how much fun, though sometimes challenging, God’s plans can be!

As I went through my emails looking for something entirely different, I found this one from Pastor Charles Bagonza. I met Pastor Charles and his wife, Joyce, when I spoke at the Arise Women’s Conference in Masindi, Uganda. We were in Uganda from September 27 to October 8, 2012, and on October 7, I spoke at Pastor Charles’s church. On October 9, I awoke to the following email from Pastor Charles, which I hold near and dear to my heart.

The word of God is full of people who prophesied and saw visions. I believe God still gives visions and prophecies, and he used Pastor Charles to confirm our move to South Africa and the path I am on today.

On 6, October 2012, in the evening, I had a prayer of thanksgiving to God for the wonderful conference we heard in Masindi through the team from the US. God gave a message in that night of meditation after prayer. God showed me, Wendy Roseman, during her ministry in Masindi, Uganda. I saw the Lord taking me into the jungle area, a very swampy land. It looked like the place the brickmakers had been using to make bricks. The swamp has a lot of deep cutting by the brickmakers. That place looked like Africa. The jungle was busy and I saw Wendy with a team of African brethren in a night of prayer. The prayer was held in the jungle, you (Wendy) and the team were in an open pit where the soil was cut to make bricks. The pit was covered by water and you were inside together with others praising and worshiping the Lord God. It rained on you with the whole team that night and you didn’t give up the night prayer. That was the time I came across walking on foot in the jungle. Around you (Wendy) was a glorious light that I followed to reach where you were in the jungle. In a distance, you saw me and shouted, “Charles, why are you moving at such a time of the night?” I told you that I was sent to tell you, “You have been sent to serve in the dark part of the world, your purpose is to reach people in the jungle and minister God’s grace.”

Now I can hear some of your wheels turning as you say, “But you’re not in Africa; you’re in the US. No jungles are here, so how are you still in your purpose?” My response is this, “Though my feet are no longer on African soil, there are still jungles and dark places. A jungle is a wild, tangled mess of vegetation or other things. Our minds can be a dark jungle of unforgiveness, bitterness, hatred, shame, and confusion. So, in essence, my purpose remains to shine the light of Jesus and minister God’s grace to those caught in the vines and the grip of unforgiveness, bitterness, hatred, shame, and confusion.

Philippians 1:6 AMP I am convinced and confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in your will [continue to] perfect and complete it until the day of Christ Jesus [the time of He return].

What is the point of the story? I may not be in Africa, but I will shine so bright with the love of Jesus that people will see His light through the darkness and jungle of their minds. When they ask, I will share with them, through mercy and grace, the only One who can bring them out…

Jesus!